Шутки школьного коня или тыгыдым сообщество → В каком...

27
04.06.2010 14:58

В каком состоянии бывает вода? – В твердом, жидком и газированном!

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- Нет, дедушка. Я хочу показать ему, какие ошибки делает его сын в твоих домашних заданиях.

Ермишина Ольга Григорьевна аватар

Что такое "Мелкие мягкие делишки для маленьких мягких окошечек"?

- Microsoft Works for Microsoft Windows.

Кольцов Михаил Петрович аватар



Плкат на двери в кабинет информатики:

Теория это когда все знают как оно работает, но оно не работает
Практика это когда все работает но никто не знает почему
Так вот здесь совмещают теорию с практикой - ничего не работает и никто не знает почему
Ермишина Ольга Григорьевна аватар

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Если прав компьютер, то это тоже проблемы пользователя.

Если компьютер говорит, что он прав, то пользователь серьезно болен.

Если пользователь верит компьютеру, то он не пользователь.

Если компьютер не включается, он не виноват.

Если компьютер не выключается, то он сервер.

Клевакина Оксана Петровна аватар

Шутка старая, но до сих пор смешная, потому что актуальная! Спасибо... Особенно про Linux в тему!!

Клевакина Оксана Петровна аватар

Здорово, +5 баллов!!! Прямо до слёз!!! В тему!

Ермишина Ольга Григорьевна аватар

Если бы операционные системы были самолётами…

DOS – Пассажиры толкают самолёт по взлётной полосе до тех пор, пока он не взлетит, затем запрыгивают на него и летят, пока он снова не опустится на землю. Затем всё повторяется сначала.

OS/2 – Для того чтобы попасть в самолёт, вы должны поставить на своём билете 10 разных печатей, простояв для этого в 10 разных очередях. Затем вы заполняете анкету, в которой указываете, где именно вы хотите сидеть, а также сообщаете, как должен выглядеть самолёт – как океанский лайнер, как пассажирский поезд или как автобус. Если вам всё-таки удаётся оказаться на борту, а самолёту удаётся взлететь, то вашему полёту ничего не угрожает…за исключением тех моментов, когда рули высоты и закрылки заедают в одном положении. В этом случае у вас остаётся достаточно времени, чтобы помолиться и занять положение для аварийной посадки.

WINDOWS’98 – Аэропорт красив и прекрасно благоустроен, кассиры и стюардессы приветливо улыбаются, попасть на борт самолёта проще простого, а взлёт проходит без сучка и задоринки. Затем в полёте самолёт внезапно взрывается без всякого предупреждения.

WINDOWS’2000 – Самолёт величиной с астероид средних размеров, со множеством навесных украшений и финтифлюшек – при этом на его борт помещается только несколько пассажиров. Стюарды суровы и величественны. Перед тем как посадить пассажиров в кресло, его заставляют пройти медосмотр и снимают отпечатки пальцев.

UNIX/LINUX – Все пассажиры приезжают в аэропорт со своими собственными деталями от самолёта, затем собираются на взлётной полосе и начинают его строить, ни на секунду не переставая спорить о том, какого же именно типа самолёт они строят.

Валишевская Александра Владимировна аватар

- Как переводится "ай донт ноу"?

- Я не знаю.

- Вот! И никто не знает!

Задорная Мария Ивановна аватар
В чем причина? Почему тебя вчера не было в школе? — Мой старший брат заболел. — А ты-то причем? — А я катался на его велике!